OK, I have to try and take this ole snot box apart and CREATE a snarling 750 CAFE RACER in a few weeks.


But this will be as tough as the others and more, as the Motor is about as much use as a hairbrush in Kojak's Bathroom.


There is a mixture of snot, sand, dirt and good old Rat crap over the bike and the motor is as seized as the Titanic's toilet door.


But with determination, money, sweat and alot of swearing, this Rat crap wearing Snotter, will rise above the stench of dispondency and roar down the road in it's new guise as a 500 pound Cafe Racer.


Well, Here we go then.
Another build, another story and yet more knuckle scrapping weeks ahead.
But hey, I choose to do this and will stop complaining.

OK, this is as I always say on builds with a totally stock snot box,
 "A real

The bike is in dire need of help, I have had a few snotboxes in my time but,
this one doesn't just take the biscuit, it snatches the whole damn box.
There is all the usual snot and grime I am used to seeing, but on closer
inspection I could see rat shit on the Motor, talk about having shit in your
Carb, I believe this really does....

Just like that long haired bloke on 2 nailed sticks,  this can be reserected
from the dead and go on to give more happiness than a guy with a trailer
load of perky breasts.


I started to take the bike apart and this thing was just snot, all the way.
The carbs were stuck and would not move at all.


The Motor was a seized up as a pacemaker in water.


I knew this would be a challenge and it sure is, I could not believe how
much crap kept falling out of this bike.
Everywhere I looked there was crap, the wire harness was torn up and hockey
repairs made .
I think the Rats had been  chanking away ( like that word) on the battery
area and shit on the Motor from afar.


The Gas tank STILL had gas in it, it stank like a 2 week old diaper and I
had to dump that stuff out quick, i am sure half the ozone has gone with
this stuff eveapourating into the ether.


Anyway, Once I took all the stuff Off, I could at least get some sort of
idea what is going to be needed.

I looked at the exhausts and they were only held together by the old ruty
chrome that wrapped around it.

The spigots were almost welded to them and 2 of them would not come out,
they stayed on the exhaust, I will use some spare ones rather than spend
half the day heating them up to pry them off.
The bike really had an adour that a deoderant manufacture would even loose a
challenge at.

All them years of sitting out in the desert had taken its toll for sure.


The Brakes were all seized up and about as useless as a brain dead
It took some time to get the caliper off the wheel as it decided to lock up
on me.
But, After pulling and pushing and alot of swearing, I got the whole 750 apart.
The forks were in pretty bad condition too and will need replacing on the uppers for sure.
The seat, well that is another story, that thing had rotted from the inside,it just crumbled like a paper wall, it was only the cover that held it together.
Getting the Motor out was not too bad, usually they sit in there and refuseto budge and with half your arse grapes hanging out ya boxers, its not agood idea to keep lifting that Motor around.And I guess that was the easiest thing to remove as I am sure it was fed up of being crapped on.
I took the frame and rims and got them bead blasted, as that gets rid of any of that stinky Rat piss smell right off the bat.
then off to the powder coaters where i shot this all Gloss black and it came out great.
This really looked good and was glad to now get into this build and start to put this Cafe Racer together.
I was Happy at the result and powder coat was darker than a pint of guiness.
I put the frame up on the bench and began to start work, I fitted the rear swing arm and got that to fit nice and smooth, then fittes a rear shock to get the ride height correct.
Then, it was onto the front end.
I had taken all the snot off the front forks and polished them, they are now as clean as a priests driving record.
It was then time to paint the fork ears and they came out pretty darn good.
The head stock and triple tree i powder coated Black and fitted new  1/4 inch bearings, packed it all in grease and slipped it all together.
The steering does not grind like a cheap pole dancer any more and is as smooth as honey.
I then inserted the polished forks and New Gators, and this went in really well.
The front end is looking Classic now.
Then I got the bloke around to check it out, he loved it but asked if we could do RED rims.
No problem, so I powder coated rims Red and then set about polishing the piss tained hubs.
They came out great, and, with New bearings fitted, this was a sweet set up.

OK, next job was to Lace the rims up and get them ready for New tubes and Rubber.

Whilst I had to wait for the New tires to be delivered, I set about working on the gas tank.


I made the inserts my old way and then bead blasted the tank to make sure no bog or mud was in there.

Gloss black set this off right and with my gold decals it was time to mask the tank up for pinstriping.


I masked her up and the lines were laid, a few coats of clear and Wham!!! A sweet looking tank.

This will have a new Chrome cap as well as a new petcock  too.


The gas tank was sealed up and she looks great, i have a few quarts of high gloss Black on this, as well as heavy duty primer and with the clear coat ontop of all the tank, it gives it a deep finish.


I will be making a Cafe seat for this with a hump styled back and most probably with the ribbed cushioning in the middle.

I am happy the way this is coming out and I am sure the guy will be more than pleased with the outcome  of the racer.


The tires are here and I shall be adding new tubes as well, want to be sure this has good quality stuff all the way through, not some half assed stuff a few other builders are doing right now.


Ok, here we go, bung on the tires and get ready for the hardware toi go onto the rims when they are ready for fitting to the bike.


Many of you email me questions about your builds and thats why  I show as many photo's as I can, to try and show you how i build these and, the problems that occur.


I do know  of a few builders of when they have sold the bike, they break down or leak or just a pile of shit cleaned up with cheap aftermarket rubbish, well, not me, they can all go and blow a monkey.


I have been into this for years and I know my stuff, others are jumping on the band wagon and I am glad to say the reports I get from customers of thier rides is a sad tale and they sell them and get me to build them one or help them repair the crap someone else knocked out fast.


I can build stuff fast but you want the quality don't you, I can't be arsed with a quick buck, just not me.

I am working class like all the rest of you and I understand what you want.


OK back to the ride, as this is all about the Black Bandit.

The rims look great with the new rubber on and I can now concentrate on other parts of the ride now this is completed.


I took the rear sprocket carrier hub and cleaned all the crap off it, I then polished this up to gleam, as it is made of alumium, and it came up prettyy good.


The rear 48 tooth was powder coated as well as the safety shield and a nice contrast with polished stainless nuts.

I then slung this all together and it looks great, the other side was the brake hub and now that is all completed and together, it is time to mount this wheel for the first time, into it's new home.


It makes the ride I think, Classic lines all the way.


The Wheel slipped in, easier than a burgler through an unlocked door.

I also had some more hardware ready to fit to this ride when the Back wheel was fitted.


The Chain adjusters were powder coated and stainless bolts added to make the contrast.

Seeing the weather will get to the rear of the bike more than anywhere it made sense to have stainless bolts etc.


I also took the brake stabilizer bar and stripped the old Black paint off it and chromed it.


Looks the parts now and sets off the rear end too.

I hooked the brake rod up and we were pretty much done with the rear section now.


Now it is onto the front end and get that rim in the forks.

But first I had to build the caliper as the old one was nasty.


The rear wheel is in and everything is all hooked up and looking great, I wanted to show a few pics for the customer, just so he can see what's going together.

And I am sure he will be stoked with how this is looking..


Well, This has been a task as the ole Bandit was a real mess.

I have come a long way with the old girl and also I am building another guyz Cafe too, so, plenty to do.

Although I do not cut corners, unless they are made of steel.

This is looking great, every cafe I build, i try to make personal and different, I do not build anything exactly the same, as I will change some patterns or add different pin lines to change the seat and light style.

This Black Bandit will be a great eye catcher and I am certain Martin will be laughing all the way to the bank.

(Maybe he won't, when I give him the Bill)

But seriously, this ride was hard as the Motor was seized solid, the Cam shaft had spun with no oil for quite some time.

The oil pump had taken a dump and then all the metal from the scorched bearing shells, just went through the motor, and at some point it must of got hotter than a Trile X rated Porn movie.

This motor has completely been gone through, the camchain was chewed up like a new bone for a Pit bull.

I am so glad to have got this motor back in the original frame.

This 750 will breathe again.

Although parts are now becoming harder to locate and in good condition.

But I have found a place to order NEW switches, as these ones were all broken inside and the wires were about as much use as a knitted diaper.

The parts will take some time to arrive, but worth the wait as they are New, and what a blessing new stuff is, no snot, no rat piss and no broken wires with them bloody pade connectors on.

The Exhaust is now ready and on the bike and I made the tail end in my tradtional style, short, loud and looking aggressive.

Still a little way to go with this build, but am almost there.

OK, I am almost there now.

I have spent some time getting the Cafe to where I wanted it.

This month has been busy.

JULY 06.

And I am now trying to push hard to build all these rides for customers.

So, the Bandit is all but completed,  just one kickstart oil seal needs to be changed.

I need to tighten a few brackets.

Then add some fuel lines and fill this baby with new oil etc and she will be ready to run.

The gas tank and seat Combo go together well and i am sure Martin will be stoked with this Classic looking Cafe bike.

I am totally pleased at the outcome and now another cool ride has come out of my stable and will soon be able to stretch it's legs for the first time this week.

Remember, this was a pile of snot with Rat shit ontop of the engine.

This motor will purr and will also have some grunt in it.

I am happy with the bobbed fender I made and I am looking forward to giving michael the keys to this wonder ride.

I still need to get some Models on this bike, so I can show the lines off and also you lot can perv at the birds arses.

I took the old master cylinder apart and then polished it all up on the buffer, it now shones like chrome and has new internals.

I made braided hoses for the brakes and the caliper is totally rebuilt.

Took me 10 minutes to bleed and now we have a new front brake, this thing will stop a runny nose.

New clutch cable and i polished the lever and fitted a NOS bolt to make this really look fresh.

Brand new chain and sprockets should hook this Monster up good and proper.

This should eat the bends up with the new rubber on the rims too.

This will soon be ready for its first road test and I am looking forward to having a go this week.

The last one I rode was Scotts Rocket and that ran great.

You can see that on www.myspace.com/caferacer750

I have a video on there and used my helmet cam, worth a look.

Stock but Rotten as an old Pear.
This Motor was as locked up as a rapist.
The Carbs were stuck like a fat lady in a turnstyle.
The electrical was as organised as a Bike ride for Labotomised freaks.
Dread to think what this Crud was from.
RAT SHIT, That's right, she's a real SNOTTER.
Gas tank had more crap in it than a sewage plant.
Steering was as smooth as sandpaper.
Guages really were junk and stank of vermin piss.
Look at that lovely tire, ROTTED like a Zombies Genatalia.
Seat was just powder inside.
Opened the seat and more powder than a Crack factory came out.
Naked as the day it began life.
Once it was bead Blasted, a new powder coat goes on.
Changed his mind on rim color, so done them red.
Polished hub and then replaced bearings.
Polished rear hub and now laced up stainless spokes.
Modify the gas tank was done today.
Painted tank and marked out for pinstriping.
Added my designed decal.
Now, that's a kick ass gas tank.
Now we are getting somewhere.
One snotty Brake drum.
Now, One Bitchin Brake drum and, polished too.
Snotty Hub.
Polished hub .
Looks great all set up.
Chromed stabilizer bar.
Front wheel has new set of boots.
Here she is.
Gauges were as Rusty as King Neptunes bathroom.
Cleaned and painted, now ready to bung together.
Guage panel was as faded as 1970's Levi's.
Wow! What a transformation.
OK, The Frame is off the surgeons table and now ready for the Heart transplant.
Motor is now fully rebuilt, now needs external claeaning and buffing.
Need to remove valve cover and polish, then fit the new heart.
There she is, plonked in the frame, now time to get this together.
Looking good, just need to hand polish the casings when I have her together.
Old front brake junction was like an old hankerchief....All Snotty.
Now buffed like a Chip Foose built Muscle car.
New intake manifolds, more expensive than a night out with a bad poker playing chick.
WOW !!!!!! Now what ya think of this?
Seat was as rotted as wooden teeth.
Bead blasted all the snot, crud and rats piss off of the seat pan.
Now it is all painted and upholstered.
White Tuck N Roll adds to the Nostalgia.
Sits as good as the factory model.
This seat is completed and really looks the part.
I bobbed the stock rear fender, this really changes the look of the rear end.
Smoother than a good salesman.
The Custom Donkey Cock tail light, was the owners request.
Looking good, not too far away from completing this build.
Look at the tank, it sure flows well.
3/4 shot.
Master Cylinder was more polished than the Queens shitter.
Gas tank looks to be a Winner.
Motor sounds awesome.
Old School headlight shows the way.